Those of you who follow my blog will know that they creep up on me and it’s normally a couple of months before I have enough clarity to post. This one is no different, however, I have forced myself to push this out for International Men’s Day, and so there may be additions later.
I run a network for women only, I have long attended networks for women only, and I love anything that empowers women and brings us together to celebrate sisterhood instead of competitiveness, but of course I hear men cry ‘what about us?’ ‘Why can’t we come’ ‘You’d soon be complaining if there was a men only network!’ ‘you feminists are men haters’. For those of you who don’t know this – there are men only networks and groups and there has been for many years. Masons (I know there’s a female branch too now) Buffs, Only Dads, Men & Boys Coalition and there are so many men setting up mental wellbeing networking groups for men only, so there’s plenty out there for you if you look for it, and there’s nothing stopping you from starting your own.
I can’t speak for other women as a rule, but certainly the women in my close network do not have anything against men, in-fact quite the opposite, we respect the masculine and enjoy the chance to be together in a feminine environment, where our talks take a slightly warmer, more maternal form of caring and sharing. When I attend a mixed networking group I am prepared to hand over business cards and have superficial conversations, when I network with women only I know I can open up a little in a room full of attentive listeners, and I enjoy listening to them.
It is really important for men to know that they are not being ‘rejected’ per say… I don’t often hear complaints from men about not being invited if I talk about a knit & Knatter or pamper day, but if you mention ‘business’ this seems to upset a testosterone button..
Female Empowerment is great for men, women networking with women is great for men, whether under the umbrella of business or sewing. We need each other! In other tribes women are together all of the time, not to talk negatively about men or scheme, just to be ‘sisters’, to work together, to support each other, and ultimately to feel much more content in their own being.
I was a terrible wife. I was unhappy, inherently; there was nothing that my husband could have done, I was a ‘lonely’ woman. If I had had the kind of life I have now when I was with him I would have been a much better wife, in every area. You must have heard the saying ‘happy wife happy life’. Trust me, female empowerment and women supporting women is not to dismiss men, it’s to help us feel connected and fulfilled as women, as nature intended, to be happy, to be strong, so that we are not miserable, insecure, lonely and bad tempered at the end of the day. We don’t hate you we need you, we need you to understand that it’s not about you, it’s about us.
For years men have enjoyed sport, work, golf, meetings, freedom, and we have been isolated with our children & housework, or in an employed environment where our wings are clipped and our voices are not heard, and we have had to compete with each other instead of connect with each other, in work, relationships, and life. Female Empowerment and Women Supporting Women is good for us, and it’s good for you!
So, on that note, happy International Men’s Day, and trust me, we want you to be happy too!